Post by queenofslow on Apr 29, 2019 20:17:06 GMT -5
Team Silver Tigers: the debut
What is the logical thing to do for over-60 recreational riders: race hare scramble in the heat, of course.
I am not exactly sure how the idea came about, but sometimes things just happen. We chose the event carefully, not wanting to attract attention from the press and social media. Last hare scramble of the season. So we found ourselves in the dogmobile at first light headed to Samsula’s landfill, behind which stretched the cow pastures where the event was to take place. Team Silver Tigers was out of its cage: watch out!
Introducing your heroes: Darrell, recently retired, and 2-yr novice rider. Started riding on a KTM 505 (“Rooster”, ex-Clint’s, great bike for beginners). Failed slowness training with Queen of Slow but graduated from Doug’s School of Whoops. Riding “Stinky” KTM 250xc (ex-Clint’s as well). Number : 327.
Doug: the mad engineer behind my Honda-KTM hybrid (and miscellaneous other contraptions which work amazingly well). After 20+ yrs away from road racing, Darrell and I convinced him that his life was incomplete without HS racing in hot weather. Riding his superlight “Hondamix”, a composite of various frames, engines, etc. from miscellaneous models and vintages. Number: 11 (he explained that was the easiest number to make with electrical tape).
Queen of Slow: manager of support logistics, executor of wills/trusts, master carver of watermelons. Among my duties: fending off the hordes of fans wanting autographs and cleaning the support van of dog hair and snot.
I must say that my riders are extremely professional. Although the pressure was high, we managed to set up camp and get the bikes ready.
No problem with tech inspection.
Getting ready for practice.
Unsure where is the start:
oh, there it is
and off they disappear in the woods
And then disaster struck: in the first half mile of practice, an out-of-control rider hit Doug from behind at full speed, catapulting him into a tree. Doug was followed, in sequence: by his bike, by the kamikaze and by the kamikaze’s bike, all piling up on him one after the other. It was not pretty. Bent handlebars, dangling handbrake, twisted tripleclamps and forks, bent front rim. Doug’s throttle hand was broken and his arm injured. He managed to finish practice (I do not know how) and return to camp. The guy who hit him has not been seen since then. (Enuf said).
I was ready to call it a day, but the Silver Tigers insisted to go on. These old guys are TOUGH!
Darrell retreated to the trailer for pre-race meditation. (In case you are wondering, the holes in the socks are for extra ventilation- cool feet equal cool head- you have seen it here first!).
While waiting for the race Doug decided to practice his one-hand skills: lifting his bike on the stand, carrying around his 60lbs tool box, and rebuilding the front end of his bike. Who needs two hands, really?
But nothing stops the SILVER TIGERS! And here they go again:
Darrell did extremely well for his first race ever. 17 out of 23. He finished three laps without hurting himself or Stinky, and with good energy left. Remarkable for a 64 year old newby. Obviously he had a good foundation: Giovanna’s Slowness School. And natural talent, of course. This boy just needs some practice passing people, and he will be a force to be reckoned with.
Doug was not so lucky. In the first lap ANOTHER out-of-control rider hit him and sent him flying ( landing on the broken hand… ouch!). His bike sommersaulted so badly that it refused to start again. Hondamix had enough of this nonsense. It took over five minutes and the help of others to get Doug going again. He finished 6 out of 23 with a broken hand, a bent front rim and tire marks over his fender (no jokes). If he had not lost the time with the crash and the bike not starting he would have finished in the top three.
The guy who hit him this time must have heard about the disappearance of the first guy, and came over after the race to make sure Doug was ok and apologize. ( Not a good idea to hurt my Silver Tigers. )
Anyway, the news spread really fast. I am already getting excellent sponsorship offers from:
AARP
Geritol
Depends
Metamucil
Ben Gay
Preparation H
And for Doug specifically: special offers from the North Florida Association of Orthopedic Surgeons and The Bubble Wrap Co. And Target wants to put its logo on Doug’s camelback.
Sponsorship opportunities are still available for hearing aids and long term elder care companies.
A representative from Medicare called to make sure that my riders do not yet qualify for coverage. I told Medicare: soon! Soon! (They will revise the federal budget accordingly).
Expect a Chippendale-style 2020 calendar, personally autographed by the Silver Tigers. Man, it is going to be great. I can see the dough rolling in. I have contacted Prevost with some ideas for our new Team Silver Tigers rig, but I am waiting for the sponsorship $ advances before I put in the order. The graphics are going to be exciting: HOWWLLL!
Technical notes for future races: Darrell- 17 pounds tire pressure may have been a tad too much. Doug: next time I will put a strobe light on the rear fender and a gopro pointed backwards. We may want to bring a spare bike and some prosthetic limbs for Doug, just in case. I am also thinking about adding spikes out of the hubs, Gladiator-style. That should convey the message but I need to check the rule book first.
All in all a bright future (albeit possibly a short one) awaits the SILVER TIGERS. We are getting ready for the next chance of death or dismemberment when playing demolition derby in a dusty cowpasture . That’s what life is all about, really.
Stay tuned!
What is the logical thing to do for over-60 recreational riders: race hare scramble in the heat, of course.
I am not exactly sure how the idea came about, but sometimes things just happen. We chose the event carefully, not wanting to attract attention from the press and social media. Last hare scramble of the season. So we found ourselves in the dogmobile at first light headed to Samsula’s landfill, behind which stretched the cow pastures where the event was to take place. Team Silver Tigers was out of its cage: watch out!
Introducing your heroes: Darrell, recently retired, and 2-yr novice rider. Started riding on a KTM 505 (“Rooster”, ex-Clint’s, great bike for beginners). Failed slowness training with Queen of Slow but graduated from Doug’s School of Whoops. Riding “Stinky” KTM 250xc (ex-Clint’s as well). Number : 327.
Doug: the mad engineer behind my Honda-KTM hybrid (and miscellaneous other contraptions which work amazingly well). After 20+ yrs away from road racing, Darrell and I convinced him that his life was incomplete without HS racing in hot weather. Riding his superlight “Hondamix”, a composite of various frames, engines, etc. from miscellaneous models and vintages. Number: 11 (he explained that was the easiest number to make with electrical tape).
Queen of Slow: manager of support logistics, executor of wills/trusts, master carver of watermelons. Among my duties: fending off the hordes of fans wanting autographs and cleaning the support van of dog hair and snot.
I must say that my riders are extremely professional. Although the pressure was high, we managed to set up camp and get the bikes ready.
No problem with tech inspection.
Getting ready for practice.
Unsure where is the start:
oh, there it is
and off they disappear in the woods
And then disaster struck: in the first half mile of practice, an out-of-control rider hit Doug from behind at full speed, catapulting him into a tree. Doug was followed, in sequence: by his bike, by the kamikaze and by the kamikaze’s bike, all piling up on him one after the other. It was not pretty. Bent handlebars, dangling handbrake, twisted tripleclamps and forks, bent front rim. Doug’s throttle hand was broken and his arm injured. He managed to finish practice (I do not know how) and return to camp. The guy who hit him has not been seen since then. (Enuf said).
I was ready to call it a day, but the Silver Tigers insisted to go on. These old guys are TOUGH!
Darrell retreated to the trailer for pre-race meditation. (In case you are wondering, the holes in the socks are for extra ventilation- cool feet equal cool head- you have seen it here first!).
While waiting for the race Doug decided to practice his one-hand skills: lifting his bike on the stand, carrying around his 60lbs tool box, and rebuilding the front end of his bike. Who needs two hands, really?
But nothing stops the SILVER TIGERS! And here they go again:
Darrell did extremely well for his first race ever. 17 out of 23. He finished three laps without hurting himself or Stinky, and with good energy left. Remarkable for a 64 year old newby. Obviously he had a good foundation: Giovanna’s Slowness School. And natural talent, of course. This boy just needs some practice passing people, and he will be a force to be reckoned with.
Doug was not so lucky. In the first lap ANOTHER out-of-control rider hit him and sent him flying ( landing on the broken hand… ouch!). His bike sommersaulted so badly that it refused to start again. Hondamix had enough of this nonsense. It took over five minutes and the help of others to get Doug going again. He finished 6 out of 23 with a broken hand, a bent front rim and tire marks over his fender (no jokes). If he had not lost the time with the crash and the bike not starting he would have finished in the top three.
The guy who hit him this time must have heard about the disappearance of the first guy, and came over after the race to make sure Doug was ok and apologize. ( Not a good idea to hurt my Silver Tigers. )
Anyway, the news spread really fast. I am already getting excellent sponsorship offers from:
AARP
Geritol
Depends
Metamucil
Ben Gay
Preparation H
And for Doug specifically: special offers from the North Florida Association of Orthopedic Surgeons and The Bubble Wrap Co. And Target wants to put its logo on Doug’s camelback.
Sponsorship opportunities are still available for hearing aids and long term elder care companies.
A representative from Medicare called to make sure that my riders do not yet qualify for coverage. I told Medicare: soon! Soon! (They will revise the federal budget accordingly).
Expect a Chippendale-style 2020 calendar, personally autographed by the Silver Tigers. Man, it is going to be great. I can see the dough rolling in. I have contacted Prevost with some ideas for our new Team Silver Tigers rig, but I am waiting for the sponsorship $ advances before I put in the order. The graphics are going to be exciting: HOWWLLL!
Technical notes for future races: Darrell- 17 pounds tire pressure may have been a tad too much. Doug: next time I will put a strobe light on the rear fender and a gopro pointed backwards. We may want to bring a spare bike and some prosthetic limbs for Doug, just in case. I am also thinking about adding spikes out of the hubs, Gladiator-style. That should convey the message but I need to check the rule book first.
All in all a bright future (albeit possibly a short one) awaits the SILVER TIGERS. We are getting ready for the next chance of death or dismemberment when playing demolition derby in a dusty cowpasture . That’s what life is all about, really.
Stay tuned!